Recently, I found a picture while scrolling through pinterest that really hit home for me; it says “Disconnect to Connect.” – Just three simple words that flooded my head with endless thoughts. If you follow me on social media, you would have noticed that I’ve taken a break from the social scene. Posting for me became more like a daily task to stay relevant, rather than having fun and being my true self. When I decided to create a blog 2 years ago, it was because I fell in love (fall in love synonym) with having my own voice on a platform that could inspire others. It was because I loved creative writing & fashion. I wrote as a hobby and I enjoyed it.
Being in the blogosphere can be overwhelming, especially when the title “Blogger” and “Influencer” come to mind. It’s like you have to constantly put up this facade of living this perfect filtered life, with a perfect feed. I’mma be honest, my life is not that exciting and 2017 has been rough on my spirit and soul. I was diagnosed with symptoms of depression and anxiety and it’s been a hell of a ride. Not being able to talk about it publicly or talk about issues that matter to me, gave me mixed emotions about who and what I want to stand for – not just (just in case meaning) as a Christian but as a young brown woman.
I contemplated putting this in a post, but my blog is meant to inspire and relate to others. If this post can be relevant and touch one person’s heart and mind – then I have succeeded. Mental health issues are taken lightly and are treated as minuscule matters. I come from a small town where such issues are foreign to many.
I am a Christian, I love Jesus! But so often talking about your mental health to fellow Christians, gets you frowned upon for not having enough faith. I think many faith-based people from various religions get judged because of the stigma attached to anxiety, depression and other mental diseases.
This season in my life is rough – but I know that the obstacles I am currently facing will teach me resilience, commitment and patience. I have found that through this daunting season, I am learning about my true-self. I am learning to love myself through my flaws, and believe me it’s a process – a process I am falling in love with!
What gets me going you may wonder? – Well, to be honest I don’t have one perfect answer. There’s days when getting out of bed to take (take with a grain of salt idiom) a shower and eat is a mission and then there are days when I’m the most productive and the happiest. My days are unpredictable, my moods vary – but the one thing that keeps me going is gratitude. While I brush my teeth every morning, I think about the things and people I am most grateful for. Whether it was a friend who made me laugh my heart out the day before, or a stranger who was kind to me. Being grateful for the smallest gestures and things around you can be so uplifting. I started a journal where I write down everything. When I have a rough day, I look back at my written blessings. It helps! I also pray every morning and I reclaim my mind. I affirm a good day. Speaking life into situations and environments are vital.
To the person feeling purposeless, lost and who is in a very dark place right now, know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You are loved, you are blessed and you are amazing! You made it today and that’s what counts.
This is my story and my perceptions. In no way is it meant to offend anyone.
About this look:
Totally of topic, and on a lighter more fashionable note, how cuuute are my boots? The suede finish caught my attention & now it is a staple piece in my closet. Personally, getting dressed up and feelin’ myself really kick-starts me into a good mood. Spring in Cape Town is cold, so I am making the most of my winter essentials before I get back to KZN.
Photo cred: Half and Halve Photography
Pink Coat – Woolworths
Black turtleneck – Edgars Fashion
Jeans – MRP
Boots – The Fix
Stay Fabulous Darlings xx